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Day the Earth Stood Still, The (2008)
IMDB rating: 5.70
Plot: A remake of the 1951 classic sci-fi film about an alien visitor and his giant robot counterpart who visit Earth.
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Directors: Derrickson Scott
Actors: Aguirre Josue,Bacon Daniel,Bjorgvinsson Sverrir,Bradford Chris,Cleese John,Close Joshua,Cotton Ben,Craven Aaron,Cross Roger R.,Dament Terence,Dopud Mike,Douglas Aaron,Dryborough Brad,Favrin Victor,Hamm Jon,Drama,Sci-Fi,
What do you think of my story so far:)?
If you’ve read the Twilight books then you’ll understand this. Imagine there’s no ‘Breaking Dawn’ and this story is the 4th book, the one after ‘Eclipse’ 
Heres a chunk from the start of the story Oh btw it’s called ‘Rising Storm’ 
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"He’s not going to agree to this," Edward’s voice calmed me down the slightest bit. "He really doesn’t like me does he? Maybe I should tell him that I’ve been sleeping over. He’ll at least respect me for being honest."
"What?! You can’t tell him! He does like you, he’s just mad at me." I tried to remember why Charlie had set a goal to get Edward out of my life. "Remember? Italy. Motorbikes. And of course Jacob."
He flinched when he realized that Charlie wanted me to be with Jacob instead of him. "No. It’s because I left you. I thought you would be better off…" I could see the pain he went through every time he tried to talk about the reasons for his departure.
"Edward, stop blaming yourself. You’re here now; that’s all that matters." I drifted away to sleep and for once I didn’t have a dream.
I awoke the next morning, still cradled in Edward’s arms. I peered up at his face. His lips were pressed into a hard line and his eyes were a golden colour. "We have to go and meet Alice." He placed me on the floor and then yanked me towards the window.
"What? I can’t just disappear without letting Charlie know where I’m going. He’ll definitely know I’m wherever you are and he’ll get mad. You go out the window and I’ll go out the front door."
"Meet you in your truck." He pressed his lips against my forehead and then waited for me to leave the room. I was stilling wearing the same clothes as I had last night so I grabbed some fresh ones on my way out. I rushed into the bathroom, changed clothes and then brushed my teeth. I slid down the stairs and walked smoothly into the kitchen. Charlie was sitting reading his newspaper with a coffee in his other hand. It was Saturday; his day off.
"You’re up a little early for work aren’t you?" He noted, laying the newspaper down.
"I er -" I quickly tried to think of an excuse for skipping work, but my mind was interrupted by the sound of footsteps coming down the stairs. Charlie glanced at me with panic in his eyes. Of course, Charlie and I would think it was some sort of murderer coming to kill us if we didn’t give them all our money and valuables – not that we had much anyway. I shot him back a frightened look before turning to face the stairs where our murderer was descending from. Relief swept through me as I saw Edward’s feet appear, but then the relief evaporated, and in its place, anger and panic took over. Why was he doing this? I retraced back to what he’d said last night. ‘Maybe I should tell him that I’ve been sleeping over. He’ll at least respect me for being honest’. I glanced back to Charlie who’s face was pale with fear. He clearly hadn’t recognized our ‘murderer’ yet. My mouth hung open as I stared at the stairs in desperation, hoping that a miracle would happen and Edward would disappear. Edward’s face was visible as he reached the bottom of the stairs. He walked over and stood at my side. I glared at his face, my eyes like fire, but then slowly turned my head back to Charlie.
"What on earth is this?!" He stood up from the table, his face had turned from pale white to a furious red. "Bella?!"
"Dad, Edward, was um -" Words failed me.
"Sleeping over." Edward finished the sentence. I shot him a furious look.
His face turned even redder. "Bella, you stupid girl! Why did you sleep with that?!" He nodded towards Edward.
"No, Dad. You don’t understand. I didn’t sleep with him, he just slept over." I could feel Edwards arms tighten around my waist. "Like a slumber party." I added.
"That’s it! Get out!" He stormed over and tried to untangle Edward’s arms from my waist, but Edward had a secure grip. "Boy, you’re skin is freezing! I hope you freeze to death!" I couldn’t believe my Dad had just said that he wanted Edward to die. "Get out!" He repeated.
"Lets go, Bella." Edward’s firm voice beckoned. He turned for the door, pulling me along with him.
"She’s not going anywhere with you! And you’re to never step another foot in this house ever again!" Charlie grabbed my other arm and yanked me back.
"Why not?" Edward challenged.
"Are you an idiot? You just slept with my daughter and now you think I’ll just let you off with it?"
"Dad, for the last time I didn’t sle-" I was interrupted in mid-sentence.
"Look, Charlie, me and Bella have something important to do. So if you’ll excuse us…" Edward reached over and pulled me back again. They were like two dogs fighting over a squeaky toy. I was the squeaky toy.
"What do you mean by important? Dragging her back to your house so you can sleep with her again?!" Charlie took hold of my arm again and pushed me behind him.
Edward sighed in annoyance. "Charlie, I didn’t sleep with her!" His voice had changed to shouting.
Oh I’m 12 btw
Rate it out of 10
Im 12 btw
Rate it out of 10!
*IM ONLY WRITTING THIS FOR FUN. I AM NOT PLANNING ON PUBLISHING IT.*
Oops sos about the repeat haha :L
Wow, I wouldn’t have guessed you were twelve! I could tell you were young – maybe fourteen or fifteen, but not 12!
It’s really good. I love your writing style but the characters don’t really seemt to fit.
I know you’re doing it in your own way, but going by the original characters, I think Edward would get around Charlie in a more relaxed way. You know what I am mean? I mean, he wouldn’t really be trying to challenge him and he couldn’t really be sighing in annoyance and shouting. He’d probably get around him with some cool, calm words. But apart from that, I think it’s great and you really have a talent.
I’d give it…. 9/10
Hope I could help =)
Good luck in advance.
The Dark Knight. | Feb 05, 2010
why would u waste your time and talent on fanfics for like one of the worst books ever? -.-
Myslef | Feb 05, 2010
Better than "Breaking Dawn." I’ll will give you an 8 out of 10.
Skyer | Feb 05, 2010
Sorry to rain on your parade.
Firstly, i haven’t read New Moon yet but I will get around to it someday.
Secondly, all this will ever be (unless you edit it slightly) is a fan story. It’s illegal to publish something that’s taking part of another person’s story
After that, I advise you keep it up. Even if people tell you it sucks, don’t give up. Practice makes perfect.
Also, well done for posting it. i write too and I just can’t bring myself to let people read it yet.
Good luck,
Colin Riely
Colin | Feb 05, 2010
