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Streaming Tarzan Online
February 25, 2010, 11:45 pm
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Streaming Tarzan Online. Streaming Tarzan Online.

Movie Title: Tarzan
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Tarzan is available for streaming or downloading.

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After publicizing this release as a 2 disc status, disney finally changed its mind and released it as a barebones single disc. Those who were waiting to pick up all those mountainous slow the scenes stuff available previously on “tarzan 2 disc collector’s edition” will be thoroughly disappointed with this release.

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However, those who missed out on previous 2 disc collector’s edition and want to maintain tarzan on a two disc residence, unexcited have the option of buying it from amazon.co.uk, where it has been released as a 2-disc special edition with all those unhurried the scenes stuff from previous collector’s edition. Objective acquire definite you have a multi-region dvd player which plays discs from all regions.

Do not lift this unless you honest want to occupy the film. Better quiet search for the traditional collector’s edition. It will be worth all the money spent.

The movie is grand, I like it at home as noteworthy as I did in the theater, BUT…There appears to be a glitch with the sound. The front left and rear fair audio channel is SWITCHED. Disney is aware of this spot (on 1.5 million disks) and isn’t doing ANYTHING about it!
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Stream The Inheritance Online
Stream The Inheritance Online. Stream The Inheritance Online.

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Those who like period pieces will very mighty devour this made for television movie, which is loosely based upon Louisa May Alcott’s novella of the same name, which novella she wrote when she was all of seventeen. With an proper cast and deft direction, this Cinderella-ish, happily-ever-after tale is one that the whole family can be pleased.

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The film, which takes state in nineteenth century America, focuses upon a wealthy family, the Hamiltons. Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton (Tom Conti and Meredith Baxter) live in gorgeous splendor on a large estate with their bookish teenage daughter, Amy (Brigitta Dau), and her slightly older companion, Edith Adelon (Cari Shayne), whom Amy adores, along with a colossal retinue of servants. Edith has a state in the household that is somewhere between upstairs and downstairs, as she is more than a servant but not quite family.

It appears that Edith, an orphan, has been raised in the household since infancy, when the Hamiltons went to Italy to choose the estate of Mr. Hamilton’s estranged older brother. The Hamiltons found the infant Edith abandoned on the Italian estate of Mr. Hamilton’s brother and believed her to be the daughter of a servant who died in childbirth. The Hamiltons were so smitten with her that they took her befriend to America with them and proceeded to raise her.

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Now a young woman, Edith’s life is thrown into a tailspin when the Hamilton’s exquisite cousin, Ida (Bridget Conley Walsh), comes to visit and be introduced to some eligible bachelors. The Hamiltons arrange for a very eligible and wealthy bachelor, James Percy (Thomas Gibson), to quit with them with an inspect towards his making a treasure match with Ida. While shopping, Edith, however, briefly meets a magnificent young man by the blacksmith’s shop, and when their eyes lock, it is savor at first seek. She later discovers when James Percy arrives that he is the young man with whom she has fallen in admire and realizes that he is beyond her arrive.

The Hamiltons, however, include Edith in their social plans for Amy, Ida, and James, primarily as a companion for Amy so that Ida and James can have some time to come by to know each other. When anguish strikes, however, and Edith saves the day, the Hamiltons reward her by racy her to a ball. There, the host takes offense that the Hamiltons should presume to insult him by appearing with the hired relieve, and Ida makes definite that Edith knows this, ruining Edith’s evening in the process.

This pomposity gets Mr. Hamilton’s dander up, and he will brook no insult to Edith. Meanwhile, James has been smitten by Edith, who draws away from him because they inhabit two different worlds, a point that the mean-spirited and jealous Ida wastes no time in driving home. Edith also draws away from him because she believes that there is a budding romance between James and her beloved Amy, whom she would not distress for all the savor and money in the world. Meanwhile, Ida continues creating mischief.

When Edith saves Mr. Hamilton’s honor by winning a horserace against the pompous host of the ball that she attended, all is well, more so because she defied convention, riding astride rather than sidesaddle. Then, Mr. Hamilton makes a discovery that shakes him to the core. A deathbed confession to Edith will bring tears to even the most hardened of viewers. This in turn causes Edith to construct an unprecedented and genuine decision. Unfortunately, on the heels of her potential sacrifice, a mysterious theft crops up, and Ida points the figure at Edith. At this juncture, a deus ex machina appears in the unlikely guise of a servant. Suffice it to say that all is well that ends well.

I absolutely loved this film, despite the fact that it was somewhat predictable. It is unprejudiced a attractive period film with gorgeous performances by the entire cast. I composed cannot understand why Canadian actor Thomas Gibson has not yet become a major star, given his exceeding righteous looks and talent. Tom Conti is especially endearing as the somewhat liberal blue blood who champions Edith. Cari Shayne gives a intellectual performance as the qualified Edith, while Meredith Baxter is satisfactory in the role of the somewhat thoughtless Mrs. Hamilton. Bridgitta Dau shines as the bookish but irrepressible Amy, and Bridget Conley Walsh is well cast as the radiant but soulless Ida.

This film is well worth having in one’s personal collection, if one is a devotee of period pieces or simply a fan of Louisa May Alcott. Moreover, at the effect for which it is selling, this DVD has got to be one of the best bargains around.

If “Small Women” is the unusual wrapped around Jo March, then “The Inheritance” is her sister Beth — exiguous and unnoticed, but sweet and heavenly all the same. This attractive period TV movie is (very loosely) based on the mediocre unusual of the same name, by the classic author Louisa May Alcott, and this is one of the few instances where the movie is vastly better than the book.

Edith Adelon (Cari Shayne) has lived with the wealthy Hamilton family ever since she was a baby, and is now the companion of bookish Amy (Brigitta Dau), and a noble horsewoman to boot. But her life changes with the arrival of two guests at the Hamiltons’ home: the pleasing, calculating Ida (Brigid Conley Walsh) and comely James Percy (Thomas Gibson) .

James and Edith are drawn together first as friends, and then by something deeper. But Ida, who wants him for herself, manipulates Edith into rejecting James when he proposes to her. Then after Edith takes set in a celebrated horse speed, mysterious thefts and a family tragedy threaten to derail her entire life with the Hamiltons.

Louisa May Alcott wrote “The Inheritance” when she was only seventeen, and the book is syrupy, over-romancitized and cliched. But the movie “The Inheritance” is what Alcott probably would have turned the book into, had she rewritten it instead of burying it in a trunk. The wilting lily Edith is replaced with a strong, marvelous young woman, and the site is spiced up with some social commentary.

To some degree, it’s a typical love-conquers-all romance, and the dialogue borders on cheesy at times, although overall the scripting heavenly marvelous. It’s the execution that is likeable. The characters ramble around lush manorhouses bulky of light and beauty, or idyllic forests. And the gooey romance is glossed over with some though-provoking commentary on stuffy traditions and hypocrisies, such as why women were not allowed to jog astride. Also a touch of tragedy, when one of the characters dies.

Cari Shayne is quite wonderful as Edith, especially since she has to be so NICE all the time; Gibson is similarly excellent, and they have some solid chemistry. Walsh is not so agreeable, but Ida is given few dimensions beyond a catty nastiness. And Dau, Meredith Baxter and Tom Conti are helpful as the brainy, bookish Amy, the long-suffering Mrs. Hamilton, and the rebellious but sweet Mr. Hamilton.

“The Inheritance” takes the same-named modern and rips it apart, turns it inside out, reembroiders it and sticks it succor together — and the result is remarkably polished and strong. Louisa May Alcott would have been proud.
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Harper’s Island: The DVD Edition Streaming
Harper's Island: The DVD Edition Streaming. Harper’s Island: The DVD Edition Streaming.

Movie Title: Harper’s Island: The DVD Edition
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Harper’s Island: The DVD Edition is available for streaming or downloading.

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We are so crooked on this reveal it isn’t droll, which must be a tribute to the writing and the direction. The producers certainly know how to accept you going, though it takes a few episodes before they can originate reeling you in and playing you the design they want to.

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At the very beginning there are too many characters–if you have ever seen Robert Altman’s film A Wedding some of this will leer familiar, but add into it a maritime setting, a unbelievable yacht, and a culture of working class people trained to anticipate the needs of the wealthy, and you have a recipe for tension true there, and that’s before you find the murders going. The families of Trish Wellington (Katie Cassidy) and Henry Dunn (Christopher Gorham, often looking oddly like lean, lanky, nutty Anthony Perkins) invite you to a destination wedding, one held at Harper’s Island somewhere in the Puget Sound, where you will be staying at the incredibly glamorous Candlewick Inn, but there will be plenty of time for slumming and seeing how the other half live.

Chief among the main characters is our heroine, played by Elaine Cassidy, the Irish actress who made a splash in Atom Egoyan’s Felicia’s Slip ten years wait on. As Abby, the daughter of the local sheriff (Jim Beaver), Cassidy plays the tragic survivor of a mass abolish that rocked the island seven years ago. Could the killer, John Wakefield, concept to have been shot down by Abby’s dad, composed be alive? Has he gone help to his ways of hanging his victims from the trees? For many episodes Fate and the unseen killer arrange it so that one by one, victims die but nobody really realizes it, thinking they have unprejudiced gone befriend to Seattle and will return for the wedding ceremony. That got a microscopic hard to swallow, but during this period we began to sort out who was who, who’s sleeping with who, who resents the power of who, who seems irretrievably scarred by the earlier murders, and something of the sociology. Now we know the characters and it hurts when one of them dies.

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The show’s gory in spots, soapy in others. So violent is it that the individual episodes are named after comical book signifiers (“Ka-Boom,” “Thwack,” etc) and after a few weeks you learn to wait for the act of violence each one stands for. The “Sizzle” is particularly terrifying, though nothing yet matches the gross death that takes dwelling in the island’s comely dilapidated church. I unruffled come by headaches when I believe about that one! Every cliché of this kind of slasher film is rehearsed here, but expertly and often with a twist. Even the one where a medium reads the heroine’s Tarot cards and suddenly sees something in them too base to build into words and she runs out of the room mumbling, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” -Like the beginning of Agnes Varda’s Cleo from 5 to 7!

“Harper’s Island” mimics the basic area of Agatha Christie’s “And Then There Were None” with a heavier emphasis on gore. This slasher series was a gamble for CBS that may not have been a ratings success, but it’s exquisite nonetheless providing some expedient thrills, episodes jam-packed with suspense, and more surprisingly, endearing character development.

The series is a self-contained 13-episode slay mystery event, which means all loose ends are tied up and most questions answered within its thirteen episode speed. Networks should embrace this formula more often as it discourages the many filler episodes that plague so many other shows that have been on air for seasons. Since there is no second or third season, producers don’t feel the need to continually provide more questions (and no answers) to string viewers along for years. More often than not, these shows often acquire canceled before viewers rep a chance to have their loyalty rewarded with a satisfying conclusion. “Harper’s Island,” while flawed, is an extremely appetizing, and intense series with more heart than you would seek information from from a slasher television reveal. Distinct this isn’t Shakespeare, but there is more to the characters than your typical “Friday the 13th” installment.

The present revolves around a wedding party held on an island–eventually, characters (and wedding guests) begin dying off in gruesomely creative ways, while those remaining are either fighting for their survival or befriend as suspects. Episode titles are in onomatopoeia make, which gives viewers a hint at how one or more unlucky character will bite the dust in any given episode (i.e. Thwack, Splash) . CBS billed this series as a Survivor-esque meets “Yell” format–meaning, each week one (or more) character is murdered, narrowing down the field of potential suspects before the ultimate shriek at the demolish.

The demonstrate does it have its flaws–the first few episodes are a bit uneven in quality as the producers try to situation up character motives and various region points. There are too many characters that only help as slasher fodder in the beginning, but it doesn’t grasp long, before the series dives into a suspenseful tour-de-force that never eases up until the last reel. Those characters who manage to live past the first five episodes or so, grow on viewers who will earn themselves genuinely eager in the various characters’ fates.

A fervent viewer will most likely be able to guess the killer’s identity before the lisp, but it doesn’t gain this prove any less delectable. The cast is lovely distinguished pleasurable offering stellar performances, my common being Katie Cassidy of “Supernatural” fame. Slasher series in the past have been derailed by critics who have denounced the films’ lack of character development. The advantage of this series is that the characters and stories evolve over a 13 episode timespan, which gives the viewers at home more than enough time to bond and become attached to the various characters. For example, one character may seen vapid and lifeless in episode one, but towards the kill, he or she is fully fleshed out and sympathetic to those watching at home.

The island locale is also very provocative. The scenary is stunning to observe at, with any normal person not hesitating to use a titanic vacation there–yet once the characters realize they’re in trouble, they’re stranded on the island and must fight for survival. Shapely soon, the island’s most significant assets–the resplendent woods, the various tunnels and hiding places, and overall seclusion–become the characters’ nightmares advance suitable. In the beginning, the deaths of minor supporting characters don;t resonate great with viewers–however, as the series progresses, likable and viewer favorites meet their demise, which I guarantee will prompt an emotional reaction from those watching at home.

While there are flaws scattered throughout the prove, and while not every region twist and turn is novel or even unpredictable, I can’t bring myself to rate this present less than 5 stars because it was ambitious and extremely savory from beginning to end–the editing is tight and suspensful with never a insensible moment in recognize, and with a note that’s billed a slasher cancel mystery series, no right-minded viewer goes in with expectations that they’re about to scrutinize a philosophical character explore of John Malkovich proportions. Simply pop your popcorn, lay aid on the couch and be pleased this awesome guilty pleasure expose.

The biggest turn on? Well, I found myself actually dismal when the very last scene ended, which reminded me of two things: a) I had become emotionally invested in characters of a slasher series and b) a proper point to, even if it’s flawed, will always leave you wanting more and not less. I couldn’t ask for worthy more. I recommend “Harper’s Island” with high enthusiasm.
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Inside Islam Movie Streaming
Inside Islam Movie Streaming. Inside Islam Movie Streaming.

Movie Title: Inside Islam
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Inside Islam is available for streaming or downloading.

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“Inside Islam” is a 2002 documentary that provides a wonderful introduction to Islam. I’ve aged excerpts from it in teaching world religions to undergraduates and high school students. Topics include Islam’s connections with Judaism and Christianity, the life of Muhammad, the Five Pillars of Islam (the profession of faith, prayer, charity, fasting during Ramadan, and the pilgrimage to Mecca), the history of Islam, women in Islam, European colonialism, Islamism, the Nation of Islam, and jihad.

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While this documentary may not provide an entirely balanced characterize of Islam (leaning heavily toward the determined), if you’re looking to earn a basic literacy in Islam–to understand what the central practices are, who Muhammad is, and a bit of the history of Islam–I’d highly recommend this video.

Some other salubrious videos on Islam:

- “Muslims” (Frontline) ;

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- “The Message,” a movie about the life of Muhammad;

- “Inside Mecca” (National Geographic) ;

- “Secrets of the Koran” (History Channel) .

And a capable, readable introduction to Islam is Reza Aslan’s “No god but God.”

I really enjoyed this film.
I search for that the other reviewers mediate it was biased. The point of the film was to introduce islam to people who don’t know anything about it. I notion it was a astonishing film. It was not biased. The things ommitted had cause to be left out, because not all muslims section in the beliefs(Such as death penalty, that is not in the Quran!!!) . The complexities can not be explained in one single film. I idea it was a very nice introduction, and quite suitable. I have been studying a lot on Islam and I definitely recommend this DVD. Very informative and tantalizing speakers! Fine footage!
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The Mountain Men Streaming
The Mountain Men Streaming. The Mountain Men Streaming.

Product: The Mountain Men
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Hawken muzzle loaders. Plugs of chewing tobacco the size of your fist. Buffalo robes. Beaver pelts. Jugs of whiskey.

But enough about last night’s party.

Director Richard Lang’s THE MOUNTAIN MEN is a rough-and-tumble fable depicting the fur trapping industry’s final days in the pristine splendor of the northern Rockies. Even in such a remote situation, the question help East for top hats made of beaver skin resulted in the virtual extinction of the buck-toothed rodents in their mountain habitats; on top of that, silk hats were snappily becoming the fashion craze, creating even more of a hardship on the gritty mountain men who trapped along countless streams and rivers, searching for what remained of the elusive beaver population.

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It was a hard life, predicated on an individual’s ability to survive in a harsh environment based on his wits and his bare hands. Interaction with other people was rare–the need to salvage along with neighboring Indian tribes a must. And infrequently, perhaps once every two or three years, the trappers would unite at a “rendezvous” to trade their pelts for cash and let off a microscopic steam. To say that such a gathering was rowdy and violent is kind of like saying turtles have shells.

Charlton Heston “shines” (a runt mountain man lingo, there) as fur trapper Bill Tyler, a serene man who only wishes to be left alone so he can gain that last valley impartial teeming with beaver. But there’s a problem: while fighting off a band of Blackfoot curved on stealing his horses and supplies he attracts the company of a young squaw (Victoria Racimo) who happens to be married to a chief with a very serious attitude (Stephen Macht) . Thus Tyler and his modern companion are forced to bustle, and urge, and bustle some more to dash the warrior’s wrath.

While Heston is solid in his role, Brian Keith absolutely steals the demonstrate as crusty Henry Frapp. Henry, a friend of Tyler’s, is a cantankerous, foul-mouthed, fun-loving old-fashioned coot who vividly breathes life into the mountain man persona. Keith dominates every scene he’s in, and he’s fun to view.

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Heck, THE MOUNTAIN MEN is fun to explore. The screenplay, incidentally, was written by Heston’s son, Fraser, who obviously did his homework concerning this racy aspect of the Broken-down West. Grab a scramble of tobacco and savor.

–D. Mikels

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I’ve always felt that this was an underrated film. In my belief it ranks as one of the best of the mountain man/Native American genre. It is also as apt a film as Charlton Heston was ever a portion of.

What’s so edifying about it? Well, first of all it has no glaring historical inaccuracies- those always drive me nuts. The costumes and props are as apt as I’ve seen. The scenery is absolutely sparkling and you feel like you are there- it always reminds me of my acquire times in the Central Rockies. As for the acting, well, you actually inaugurate caring about the characters, and thats a magnificent beneficial brand of favorable acting in my book. The dialog is also among the most consistently amusing and clever that I’ve heard- there’s nothing phoney or forced about it. Heston and Keith play off of each other perfectly. Not least of all, the Indian peoples are treated with the dignity and complexity that they deserve- no stereotypes here.

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I don’t bewitch every DVD that comes along, but I had to have this one for my personal collection. It unbiased makes me feel marvelous to peek it when the unique world starts to score me down….
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Stream The Search for Robert Johnson Movie Online
Stream The Search for Robert Johnson Movie Online. Stream The Search for Robert Johnson Movie Online.

Movie Title: The Search for Robert Johnson
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The Search for Robert Johnson is available for streaming or downloading.

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Did Robert Johnson really sell his soul to conventional Scratch at the crossroads? John Hammond, Jr. explores the life and times of this legendary bluesman. Hammond, a radiant blues musician himself, travels through the runt towns of the Mississippi Delta and interviews several of Robert Johnson’s contemporaries and acquaintances, including Johnny Shines. Hammond even tracks down a woman who claims to have been Johnson’s wife. Most of the interviewees are in the later years, giving the documentary a living history feel. The documentary is filled with Johnson’s music, powerful of it performed by Hammond, in Delta settings. It is quite stirring to behold Hammond playing Crossroads at the crossroads. If you are a fan of the Delta blues, this is a must have film.

If you are a fan of the blues you MUST have this tape, no inquire about that.

One thing I like about this film is that it is as authentic as recent. The is a marked dissimilarity in the interview segments when comparing this film with Cant You Hear The Wind Howl. In this film John Hammond Jr is interviewing the woman Robert Johnson cries out for, Annie Mae… in this film when JH Jr plays the song to her she has an expression that she hears a issue from the grave and is visibly affected by the music. In the other film she is inviewed but appearing more relaxed and prepared for discussing Robert Johnson. The corner dueling scene between John Hammond and Johnny Shines is agreeable, its as terminate to the steady thing as I will probably peek.

This is a most expedient documentary, I hope it is able to get its design to DVD, for blues fans it is a must have documentary.
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Stream Fatal Fury Online
Stream Fatal Fury Online. Stream Fatal Fury Online.

Movie Title: Fatal Fury
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Fatal Fury is available for streaming or downloading.

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“Fatal Fury: The Motion Picture” is one of the better video game based Anime’s. Even though the characters have this peculiar look to them, overall animation is beautifully drawn and accentuated by the energetic action sequences. A story of several martial artists out to stop a man from achieving god-like status, by acquiring Armor of God, might seem a bit cheesy at first, but once you get into the movie, it is very exciting to watch. Another great thing about this Anime is that you don’t have to know a thing about the video game to appreciate the movie. But if you do play the video game, it is even a bigger treat, to see all those awesome fighting moves come to life in full force. Quite an action spectacle.

I bought the VHS of this movie a long time ago and loved it. I loved it so much that I watched it about 50 times. I knew everything about the quality of the tape from when the audio screwed up to when certain parts were going to be fuzzy. When I bought the DVD I watched it and nothing, not one speck of fuzz was to be found, the sound totally blew me away too, way better than VHS. There are also a lot of extras on the disk that I liked too. Such things as Theatrical Trailers both in English and Japanese along with drawings, a backstory feature, and a lot of information about Viz including additonal trailers from other Viz Video offerings(a lot of them) made this disk well worth it’s money. Words cannot explain the quality of both the video and the audio in this DVD. Amazon.com has the best price I’ve seen for this DVD anywhere on the internet. Don’t miss out on it!
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Feast II: Sloppy Seconds Review
Feast II: Sloppy Seconds Review. Feast II: Sloppy Seconds Review.

Product: Feast II: Sloppy Seconds
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I fair read the first three angry/disappointed/offended reviews for this movie and feel compelled to throw my gain understanding into this discussion.

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This movie, like its prequel, is fun as hell to gawk. John Gulager clearly loves cheesy personalities and unnecessarily grossing out his audience–it seems like that’s the important reason why he made Feast and Feast II. Both movies are more satirical of the monster movie subgenre than they are commemorative–I would compare them with Weep and Tremors.

The whole scene inside Instruct and Lightening’s “fort” was absolutely hilarious, because it’s clear that the movie is incredibly aware of itself during that scene. Slasher’s probably the funniest character, but Gulager’s writers did an advantageous job making Honey Pie the dumbest bitch you ever saw and making that other car salesman (forgot his name) an noxious sap (I loved that the movie kept putting him in situations in which he could redeem himself and then making him fail miserably) .

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It’s a vast movie to peek (especially with a group of friends), and it’s beautiful unpredictable in a few instances (I noticed the girl who wrote a review a few spaces before me mentioned the baby scene–that was awesome) . I would highly recommend this movie to anybody who appreciates a monster movie that can fabricate them laugh.

I didn’t like the new Feast. It was insensible and uninspired. Feast II, however, truly outdoes its predecessor, and going down as one of the most jaw-dropping movies I’ve ever seen. It’s impossible to truly encompass how wild this movie is and how many bizarre turns it takes, but I’ll give it a shot.

A woman biker gang who leer like the SuicideGirls are on the hunt. Led by a shotgun-toting, German Sheppard blasting, alcohol swilling, tattoo covered unpleasant a*$ named Biker Queen (BQ), they’re a formidable group distinct to cause havoc and reveal tubby frontal nudity. BQ is looking for her sister, who objective happens to be the biker chick from Feast who got her leg severed and then got strapped to a homemade bomb as monster bait. Let’s go befriend about 16 hours…

An explosion happens in a dinky town – ostensibly for an alien landing – and aliens soon dash people around, murdering, decapitating, and destroying the town. Meanwhile, midget luchadores named Negate and Lightning are in their, one of them engaged in a vigorous railing of his girlfriend. Off with her head! The character Hobo from the first film is in jail, and gets to spy a monster indulge in the jailer. An infidelitous wife (Secrets) and her slick talking venerable car salesman husband (Slasher), along with his employee (Greg Swank) – who is proud of his shapely mustache and is the guy with whom the wife has been cheating – are sneaking through the alleys of town to avoid the monsters. Later, Lightning is seen from the encourage, running away with what appears to be a flesh colored night stick attached to his waist.

Now assist to the biker chicks…they have an arsenal of weapons, and they’re P.O.d. They rep the Bartender from the modern, hiding amidst the carnage. Tons of gore, stupid bodies are lying everywhere, dismay is palpable. The Biker chicks want to know where BQ’s sister is, and Bartender knows. As a few unhappy nobodies soon earn out, derive in BQ’s device, and you die. Point blank shotgun blast to the chest! Neck shot! Dual Ball Peen hammer blast from a leather bikini wearing valkyrie. After the executions, guess who shows up? Honey Pie, the coward, imbecile blonde from the first movie who got into the semi and rode off without attempting to abet the others. The Bartender is not blissful to stare her. He proceeds to beat her head against a toilet that desperately needs to be flushed – and the person who honest aged it desperately needs more starch in their diet – then he finishes the battle by biting her ear off ala EVANDER HOLYFIELD VS. TYSON. And if that doesn’t come by you pumped up, allow me to attempt a summarization of the greatness to follow:

Slasher avoids a 2 foot-high pile of alien dung; the Bartender channels his inner Clint Eastwood from Gran Torino, throwing zingers out until the very end; Lightning tells someone, “I sh#@ on the mother who gave you birth!”; puke fetishism gets mixed what appear to be LSD hallucinations; an alien with a massive wang rapes a defenseless cat for no reason; there’s a grotesque alien dissection; ruptured intestines protrude out of a buxom biker’s tight leather jacket; midget entrails accumulate pulled out like a hearty linguini and marinara pasta dish, a midget catapault gets built with nothing more than a Harley and the Suicide Girls’ tank tops (I told you!), and gets tested with the decaying mess that worn to be the midgets’ grandmother; a guy jumps off the roof of a building and impersonates Tarzan by using a severed power line; midget wrestling!; a complete barf-o-rama takes location that would invent Lard Ass from Stand by Me proud; facials are delivered via what can best be described as alien autopsy mixed with cheesy Japanese tentacle porn and a fire hose; monsters climb the sides of a building and net introduced to the game of Hasbro Whac-A-Mole; and the Mexican luchador delivers a flying descend kick to one of the monsters.

And THEN it gets crazy!! The scene avoided by most, Greg ends up carrying a baby like a 60s era football, juking two monsters in the streets like Barry Sanders. FUMBLE! It’s off the wall wrong, and over the top hilarious at the same time.

This is a movie you have to perceive with friends. It’s imperfect, and you’re guaranteed to have a very fun time. Objective after the midget fight, The Bartender says, “I positive as s#@* seen everything now.” I concur.
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Streaming The Piano Online
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Movie Title: The Piano
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Jane Campion’s “The Piano” does what many truly great films do: It inspires fascinating discussion and provokes mixed reactions. The male friend with whom I saw it back in 1993 and I were so enthralled that we kept our significant others waiting to leave for our respective Christmas vacations because we kept phoning each other to discuss symbolism and interesting themes in the movie. While I continue to absolutely love the film, I also recognize why some viewers have not shared my reaction. Perhaps you have to have at least considered a forbidden love affair or perhaps you have to have found yourself trapped in a relationship where you feel you have lost your voice to appreciate what Campion explores.

The story centers around Ada (Holly Hunter in an Oscar-winning performance) and her daughter, Flora (Anna Paquin–who also won an Oscar for her extraordinary performance). They leave their upper-class home in Scotland after Ada’s father (apparently) arranges her marriage. Ada, who has willed herself not to speak since age 6, expresses herself through her beloved piano.

The true story of who fathered Flora is never revealed in the movie, but the context suggests that she is Ada’s illegimate child born from an illicit affair. The hinted-at story of Flora’s conception provides a key to understanding both why Ada later begins an affair with her New Zealand neighbor Baines (Harvey Keitel) and why she makes a mail-order marriage in the first place. I suspect that Ada’s aging father may have wanted to see her settled–preferably far away so that her unconventional behavior would no longer be a source of social embarassment–and given Ada’s muteness and out-of-wedlock child, her father probably couldn’t find a suitable suitor in mid-Victorian Scotland.

Stewart (Sam Neill) first encounters his future wife on a lonesome gray beach surrounded by her crated belongings. His Maori porters begin carrying many household items up the muddy path to his dreary homestead. But Stewart refuses to bring the piano along, despite Ada’s apparent distress and Flora’s pleas that her mother MUST have her piano.

Ada’s piano, abandoned on the barren New Zealand beach, captures the sense of what 19th century colonial life might have been like for too many women–treasured possessions, the last ties to “civilization” left behind.

Rendered voiceless without her piano, Ada begs Stewart to return for her instrument through notes and more pleas from Flora. Finally she persuades Baines–a colonist whose tattoed face evidences the extent to which he has “gone native” and who is considered less civilized by his neighbors–to guide her back to the beach. Ada comes to life again as she, at last, gets to play. Drawn by her passion for the piano, Baines arranges with Stewart to trade land for the piano. Without consulting his wife, Stewart assures him that Ada will provide lessons too.

During first of these lessons, Ada strikes her own bargain with Baines, whom she still considers a boor: She will trade sexual favors to earn back her piano, one key at a time. Ultimately, her reluctant bargain grows into full-blown love and passion. The dark, brooding tone of “The Piano,” however, suggests that something in this situation will go tragically, and probably violently, wrong.

Campion has filled her movie with haunting piano music (actually played by Hunter) and intriguing imagery. The metaphor of piano as voice and losing and regaining one’s voice, Flora’s role in changing her mother’s fate, the question of whether Ada’s bargain reflects a woman taking control of her life or just being victimized in a different way, and many other complexities make this a movie worth watching again and again and again.

I missed this movie in the theaters 10 years ago, and saw it for the first time purely by chance on HBO recently. I was so enchanted that I watched each of the next three showings in the very same day, and then bought the DVD for my collection. It is one of the most unique, truly deep, thought provoking, awe-inspiring, movies I’ve seen in a while. The drama is almost Biblical, the love story almost Shakespearian in quality (think Othello). I was enraptured by the music, the crashing waves, and the amazing synergy between the players.

And Harvey Keitel – who knew? Those gangster/tough guy roles just don’t even touch this man’s talent. George Baines is intense, tender, passionate, a total jerk – so it would seem – but underneath the gruff exterior lies the heart of a prince. Keitel really puts it all out there, literally and figuratively. It’s a risky role and it works for him.

Holly Hunter was spectacular, as usual, but in this film the fast-talking, high-energy woman you came to know in “Broadcast News” or “Texas Cheerleader Murdering Mom” must dig deep. Ada’s silences surpass powerful, she conveys more with her facial expressions than most people say out loud in a lifetime. Speech is clearly an overrated and overused form of communication. Ada’s will is almost a character onto itself. And one can see clearly that no one is more surprised by her emerging emotions and unfolding events than she.

Sam Neill’s character is sad, broken, pathetic, frightening, and your basic worst nightmare all at once. Jealousy is indeed and ugly and and devastating emotion.

I disagree with a few of the other reviewers about Anna Paquin’s character, Flora. Some saw Flora as innocent. Watch closely. She’s diabolical, almost schizophrenic. She has the wide-eyed, innocent visage of a pathological liar. Note the scene with the photograph, the dog under the porch, her conversations with the other women in the village (where you begin to see her turn on her mother as she realizes that she’s being replaced as the center of her mother’s universe) and when her final act of betrayal results in horrific violence (don’t think for a second that she didn’t know what she was doing), then note her repentence, and subsequent absolution (the soiled angel wings in the river), and her redemption. Miss Paquin could never be considered a “child star” she’s already shown more maturity than many adults in film today.

And of course, the Piano, the center of it all, Ada’s voice, the music in this movie is so moving and expressive, so perfect for each scene. My next purchase is the soundtrack.

In sum, heart-achingly beautiful, devastatingly real and dream-like all at once. I highly recommend.
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The Civil War – A Film by Ken Burns Movie Streaming
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There aren’t too many productions from television that one can call “suitable,” but Ken Burns’ The Civil War qualifies. Burns uses photographs, music, speech, maps and historical context to notify the chronicle of the second most formative event in the nation’s history. And since in those days people wrote…diaries, letters, journals…there is the written portray not fair of the titanic leaders, the politicians and generals, but of the wives and sweethearts, the nurses and doctors, newspaper editors and farmers. Most of all there are the words of the soldiers. Burns shows the importance and the sweep of the war, but in section he does it through the lives of average people caught up in events they may not have completely comprehended, but which they believed in.

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If the words themselves have power, so do the voices. Burns recruited ample voices, some actors, some not, to sigh the words, distinctive voices that give broad resonance to what we explore. Julie Harris as Mary Chestnut, Charlie McDowell, a Virginia reporter, as Sam Watkins, Arthur Miller as William Sherman, Jason Robards as Grant, Studs Terkel as Benjamin Butler, Sam Waterston as Lincoln, and many others. He has David McCullough as the narrator. McCullough, an outstanding historian and writer, does a incredible job. Burns also uses a number of historians to underline key points. Foremost, in my understanding, is Shelby Foote. Foote is the author of the sage three-volume Civil War. With his Southern accent, celebrated sense and soft irony, he’s a exciting raconteur.

The program is never dry or plain. It is absorbing and emotional. Both sides felt they were fighting for a pure cause. What is particularly touching is that, as a people, we had not yet lost great of the capacity for simple, unadorned, unembarrassed feelings, whether it be patriotism for one’s country or worship for one’s wife. I challenge anyone to read this letter from Sullivan Ballou, a 32-year-old soldier in the Union Army, to his 24-year-old wife, and not sit apprehensive with emotion. Ballou was killed in the first battle of Bull Bustle a week later.

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July 14, 1861

Camp Clark, Washington

My very dear Sarah:

The indications are very strong that we shall recede in a few days-perhaps tomorrow. Lest I should not be able to write again, I feel impelled to write a few lines that may descend under your gaze when I shall be no more . . .

I have no misgivings about, or lack of confidence in the cause in which I am engaged, and my courage does not close or falter. I know how strongly American Civilization now leans on the triumph of the Government and how gargantuan a debt we owe to those who went before us through the blood and sufferings of the Revolution. And I am willing-perfectly willing-to lay down all my joys in this life, to aid beget this Government, and to pay that debt . . .

Sarah my like for you is deathless, it seems to bind me with great cables that nothing but Omnipotence could break; and yet my admire of Country comes over me like a strong wind and bears me unresistibly on with all these chains to the battle field.

The memories of the delighted moments I have spent with you advance creeping over me, and I feel most satisfied to God and to you that I have enjoyed them for so long. And hard it is for me to give them up and burn to ashes the hopes of future years, when, God willing, we might unexcited have lived and loved together, and seen our sons grown up to suited manhood, around us. I have, I know, but few and diminutive claims upon Divine Providence, but something whispers to me-perhaps it is the wafted prayer of my microscopic Edgar, that I shall return to my loved ones unharmed. If I do not my dear Sarah, never forget how great I savor you, and when my last breath escapes me on the battle field, it will impart your name. Forgive my many faults and the many wretchedness I have caused you. How thoughtless and foolish I have often times been! How gladly would I wash out with my tears every microscopic residence upon your happiness . . .

But, O Sarah! If the plain can approach abet to this earth and flee unseen around those they loved, I shall always be advance you; in the gladdest days and in the darkest nights . . . always, always, and if there be a soft dash upon your cheek, it shall be my breath, as the frigid air fans your throbbing temple, it shall be my spirit passing by. Sarah do not mourn me dead; reflect I am gone and wait for thee, for we shall meet again . . .

————–

The program flows over 11 hours on five discs. In addition to the documentary, the discs are stuffed with background information…maps, documents, biographies and additional interviews. This is a honorable production and is worth every penny.

Ken Burns has established himself as one of the greats in terms of historical documentaries. The Civil War is Mr. Burns’ greatest work. The attention to detail brings the history to life. Mr. Burns does an beneficial job of bringing humanity to the tragic time in America. With the consume of solder’s and family letters it is evident what a difficult time it was to be an American. Originally aired on PBS in September of 1990, nearly fifteen years later the series remains the ultimate sage about the United States darkest time.

The series is finally released on DVD. While the note is a puny high the extraordinary quality of the series makes the cost very reasonable. Ken Burns’ Civil War is required for any Civil War historian’s collection. The series is also a mountainous intention for those wishing to learn more about the Civil War. I would recommend this to anyone that loves historical documentaries. It does not gain any better than The Civil War – A Film by Ken Burns.

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